Step 1 of the FI Program has 2 parts to it. The first is finding out how much I’ve earned in my lifetime. The second is what have I got to show for all that money earned?
In other words, I also have to find out my net worth… ‘by creating a balance sheet of assets and liabilities’!
‘For the years you have been working for wages, a certain amount of money has entered your life.’ I guess it’s talking about the first part of Step 1, and I decided not to hassle you with the boring story of my employed life, how long I worked in each job and stories with those jobs SO… I’ve calculated approximately $310,000. That’s not a big number because there were quite a few years that I was just a homemaker.
Checking over my employed life and reliving parts of my past I was surprised to find that through this Step, I may be able to find myself released from the fear of being not enough because I never made enough. It feels subtle, but I’ve always felt like somewhat of a burden to my family because of it. It keeps me from doing, creating, dreaming and trying to put my dreams into fruition however small.
Journeying in the past I found that I know I could’ve done better, but there’s no changing my spending and life decisions. You know what? I even felt some sort of closure from it all. I thanked my past for making me who I am today, and I somewhat believe that it has readied me for the present and hopefully, the future.
All in all, it was both a new and awkward experience to be able to call old co-workers or people that knew me as I worked in said employment areas to reminisce. Mostly strange. Of course, I really wasn’t expecting to reach out to people. Usually I like projects that I can do on my own. You know?
I’m satisfied to say that I’ve done this Step the best I could.
Now back to ‘What have I got to show for it?’ 310,000, although an approximation, made me aware that I have been spending money based on what I THOUGHT I needed when it’s more convenience and to be honest, dumb decisions.
This is still only Step 1. So far, my approximate lifetime earnings are $310,000. As I try to figure out how to do a balance sheet, I’m starting to get both excited and even more scared about what other discoveries I would find. I end with the book saying that I should go through these steps with one attitude in mind: “No Shame, No Blame.”